Letting Go

Good times......... Some of the best times I have had were all by myself. They did not incorporate some of the other components of good times I would usually include, like friends and family, laughing and dancing and singing, good food and even better wines....

These were a different kind of good times. Solitary times. Times of peace, of understanding without words the great mystery of my life, the profound power of Letting Go and Letting God. Of seeing my whole life handed over to the powers that be, not as a passive non-participant, but as a willing and enthusiastic, responsible, Co-Creator.

A dear and valued friend once told me - as I banged my head against the same wall over and over again and then questioned why I did it as I rubbed my sore head (and heart) - that we do things untill we don't do them anymore. So simple, so true. I blinked twice and thought about that. I wondered when I'd have learned my lesson and have the strength and wisdom to no longer go down the same road, knowing full well the dangers with which it was fraught, each time thinking - this time I won't fall in that hole. I wondered when I would learn to not go down that road at all. So she told me of the concept of Wu Wei - Let Go and Let God.

I recognized in those words a sensory wisdom that I remembered from childhood when I was adept at Wu Wei without knowing what to call it. I felt it rather than thought it. I simply felt that if I could name it and let it go, all would be well. Nothing was so huge I had to hang on to it.  Nothing was so important God couldn't fix it for me. As a child I had no need to feel in control. I trusted the outcome God chose for me. I was little enough to know I wasn't big enough to see the big picture. Only God was big enough. And I knew that.

Only a few years into adulthood I was losing that perspective. Exact manner of outcome began to matter, storyline began to count, control became imperative. Lucky for me, that is when my friend came along.

Still, what came as easily as breathing when I was a child is an ongoing lesson today. There are so many more layers, prickly, reluctant little layers to peel away now before one reaches that inner core of peace and calm and faith. All those 'Yes but's. We are wrapped in layers of experience, layers of pain and joy, fear and hope, love and hate. Hindered by the need to control all these, to mix them just so in our own private recipe to keep us at the greatest level of comfort possible. Comfortably numb.

 In Wu Wei there is room for none of this. There is no desire or need for any of this when you float on an ocean of peace. You feel everything but it passes through, on into an eternity for which you have no concern because all is well. All is Now.

 

 How does one Wu Wei? If you ever figure it out, do let me know. I have fallen into that state on many occasions, but never on purpose. The only thing I can say is I was willing. I was searching. I was naming the pain, the fear and the anger and not letting it fester in the dark recesses of my being. I was in an active state of Letting Go when God came along and said "Let Me."

P.S. This one's for you, Miss Tucker!!